Tuesday, July 18, 2017

My Journal Entry - A Surprising Phone Call

Jesus, I need You. I don't have to have bands, loud music, lights, or special services to meet with You. Tonight I sit among hundreds of worshippers. I'd rather be sitting alone somewhere enjoying You and meditating on Your word.

 I know You are here. Do You have something to say to me? Your call on my life is to follow You. Your call on my life is to follow You but to also count the cost for doing so because, it is not an easy road. Do You have all of me Jesus? You use the one who says, "Here am I send me no matter what!"

I surrender. No matter what the cost is I surrender. I surrender to follow You. I live for You. I exist for You. I am Yours do with as You please. 

That truly is my heart. That journal entry could have been taken out the pages I prayed and wrote this morning. The fact is I wrote that at a youth camp I preached at on July 15, 2008.

It is one thing to write such things. It is a whole different matter to pray them. You go a step further when called to actually live it.

I sat in a park under the shade of large tree reading that entry today. At first I did not even know it was a journal entry. I found it in a small book I write in from time to time. I use it to take notes and write in it when I don't have my journal of choice, a spiral bound notebook, handy. I read that entry with great interest this morning.

It sounded pretty similar to things I prayed earlier this morning. When I saw I wrote those things back in 2008, nearly nine years ago to the day, it shocked me. Just a year later God would call me to leave FBC Paradise to go to Seminole.

When I finished reading that journal entry my phone rang. On the other end was Joel Perritte. He is a guy I poured my life into when he was college aged. He is now a husband, father, pastor, and missionary. What he told me next tested what I just read.

He told me of a church near where he lives. Joel reported the church is an inner city church in a high crime area. He further relayed the city boasted one of the highest murder rates in the state of Texas. He told me about the racial diversity of the congregation and what they were doing to impact the lives of the inner city. He said for a month he has thought of this church and wanted to send my resume there. The purpose of the call was to see if I would be interested.

There I sat. Talking a good game lately and as far back as 2008 about being surrendered, wanting to follow Jesus, and willing to pay the price for wherever His call might lead me.

Inner city. High crime zone. Murder. With all of that in front of me am I still willing to follow? Am I still surrendered? Am I still counting the cost? Immediately I think of the words to the song I blogged about earlier this week, MAKE MY LIFE A PRAYER TO YOU and the words; No empty words, no white lies, no token prayers, no compromise. 

Joel asked if I was interested. I responded, "Jesus has my yes. I put no restrictions or filters on that yes. I will go wherever He wants me."

Now, that does not mean that church will even be interested in me. I have to entertain the opportunity. That is what any true follower of Jesus would do. He never said following Him would be easy. To the contrary, Luke 9:23 (ESV) 
23  And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. 

That does not mean to suburbia behind security fences and gated communities. He sometimes sends His followers to high crime areas in inner cites with mass murders. I am a hypocrite if I am not willing to follow Jesus there but jump at the chance to follow Him to some prestigious church where the members have deep pockets and I live in comfort and minister in the lap of luxury. 

While I cannot say with any certainty I know clearly where I am called to go I just know I have to remain willing to entertain all options until He opens the door. All options are on the table. We will see what lock Jesus chooses to unlock and open the door.


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