I did something yesterday afternoon I have not done this whole revival. After lunch I took a two-hour nap. It felt wonderful. For twenty-two days I have pushed myself getting up early to pray, studying for messages, in addition to my pastoral responsibilities. A nap revived my body and mind physically.
When I came to the office I felt the Lord calling me to preach from Gal 6:9. Deep inside I continued to wrestle with the hard truth that it seemed the revival had lost momentum. As I wrote in a previous blog, it seemed the church had rejected the word of the Lord in the morning service by and large. Part of me felt it was over. Another part of me refused to lie down and quit.
For twenty-two straight days I have felt like a prophet declaring the word of the Lord. Last night seemed much different. I felt like a pastor again feeding the sheep. I shared honestly the wrestling in my own mind about whether to continue or whether God has turned our focus to live out what He has done in our hearts in the community.
There is a challenge for us not to continue to uselessly kindle fire on God’s altar. I know there will come a time to shut the gate on this revival. We cannot manufacture the fire of God. That is His Sovereign move. We looked at the scriptures and slowly chewed on spiritual food. Does not losing heart mean we do not give up on God moving and breaking through in this revival? Does it mean God has released us and now we set our minds to all the work that needs to be done in the days ahead? Even while I preached I did not have the answer to those questions.
I know they wanted me to give them an answer but the truth is I do not know. I have listened to what others have said. “God is not done. He is not through working.” It dawned on me last night that God is never through working. He always has more to do and more revelation of Himself to share. Whether He extends the meetings for weeks or shuts it down He will continue to work. Here is the real question. Has God done all He purposed to do in this revival? At some point the vast majority of FBC members stopped supporting the work. Did this grieve the Spirit of God? Did God shut the revival down because we as a church did not hunger for more and chose to run from Him in rebellion rather than obeying the word of the Lord? Did God purpose to do much more. Is God still purposing to do much more? Those are questions I do not have the answers for.
One of the interesting dynamics of this revival has been that I have always known that when it did end my work here in Seminole continues. I will still have the responsibility to ask God to feed this flock, take my watch on the walls of Seminole, give leadership to our future, and labor to plant gospel seed and reap a harvest of souls. My work does not end the last day of the revival. Even while I preached last night I did not know which direction to go. I want to honor the Lord and I have sought to give Him every chance to breakthrough. There have been tears, countless prayers, hard preaching, counseling during the invitations, victories, euphoric highs, and continual spiritual struggles for the soul of Seminole.
When this does come to an end I will have no regrets. I have given myself to this revival since last May. At the end of the message last night I asked people to sit before the Lord and listen. It was a sweet time. I felt great peace. Jase got up and addressed the church from [Matt 5:16] about letting our lights shine before the Seminole community. I wrestled back and forth about what to do. In the end I finally decided I did not have a clear word from the Lord about quitting so I extended the meeting for Monday night.
Many would say I am quitting and giving in. It is 3:30 a.m. as I write this. I am up and about to take my watch on the wall as I have done for the past three weeks. I trust the Lord will give me His message as He has done for the past twenty-two days. There is no quit in me. There is the realization that the services are different now. They have taken on the feel of good services but not the intense revival services we enjoyed in the first two weeks.
I want God to keep moving and will ask Him for that today. This church can testify to the truth that over and over again I exhorted them not to take God’s outpouring for granted. I warned them that as suddenly as God sent the revival He could turn off the faucet. I challenged them to partake of this fully and to continue to seek God because none of us may see anything like this again in our lifetimes. When God turns the faucet off I want to be honest and acknowledge that as the case. When that time comes I will courageously shut the gate and not continue to uselessly kindle fire. When the revival ends God will direct our focus on the work to be done in the days ahead. God has given me a lifetime worth of work right here as the pastor of First Baptist Church in the city of Seminole. I press on in prayer.
We could show up tonight and feel the burning intensity of God’s presence. God could draw the lost to come in mass. Many could be saved again in the service tonight. God could ignite a revival fire that could spread all over West Texas. I lay my life on His altar to do whatever His will is. At least for tonight, revival continues.
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