I see the tactic of the enemy to counter my desire for more of God and revival in Paradise. My schedule keeps filling with unplanned and unforeseen things that keep me from lingering with the Lord longer. That is not to say I have not been still seeking God. It means those times feel rushed and my life feels crammed with too much activity. Since I left for youth camp eleven days ago and returned I have not slowed down. Even when I get up early to seek the Lord I am pressed for time with other obligations.
Today is the first day in a long time that I do not have to be anywhere and I got up early enough to really enjoy some unhurried time with the Lord. This entire week has been frustrating with my schedule. There is always something more to do and somewhere else to be.
If the enemy can keep me busy he will also distract me from this glorious pursuit. In our society we equate busyness as a badge of honor. We burn the candle at both ends. We get up before dawn and cram our days with activity until after the sun sets. Schedules like that do not foster our getting to know God better.
I am committed to getting to know God better. If that means I have to get up earlier then I will. If I have to say no to good things so I can choose the best thing, more time with God, then I will say no to the lesser. In these days I have lived with a mild frustration everyday. I resent the things that pull me away from more time with God. Yet, I am not called to live as a monk sequestered from people. I am a pastor. I serve real people with real needs. I live in a real community where I am called on to make deep deposits in the lives of the residents. I have to find the right balance in more time with God and being available to minister to people.
None of these things can supersede my desire and need to linger in the Lord's presence. Yesterday, during my time with the Lord, I kept sensing God wanted to speak to me but I could not stay focused. In the middle of my prayer I thought about a book and spent some time trying to locate the book on the shelves. I then thought about an email I needed to respond to. Suddenly it dawned on me that the enemy did not want me to hear from God yesterday morning. I dialed in my mind and attention only to be distracted by other thoughts minutes later.
I am convinced the enemy did not want me to hear from God. My mind raced with thoughts of all I needed to get done. Eventually God stilled my mind and heart. [Ps 46:10] "Cease striving and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted on the earth." Cease striving. That is exactly what the past eleven days have felt like. Striving with endless activity. Another way that verse is translated is "Be still and know that I am God..."
On a day like this one I want to be still. I want to slow the pace of life. I want to make these moments alone with the Lord the best part of my day. That means activities must cease other than prayer, meditation, reflection, and scripture reading. I must press my ear to the lips of God to hear His every whisper. That is what I long for today.
While others sleep I have more pressing matters that draw me to this secret place to commune with my Father. I have been seeking the Lord for the better part of thirty years but never have I experienced what I have been experiencing these past several weeks. I have never known sweeter times with the Lord. My heart flames with love and passion for Him. I am eager to meet with the Lord each day. My ears are attentive to the things He wants to say to Me.
I come here alone. I come with expectation to get lost in the Lord's presence. Time seems to stand still. I am unaware of time passing (unless I have to be somewhere else at a certain time.) Today I have no such demands. Time is irrelevant. All I want to do is to linger in His presence. I want to enjoy every moment with Him. I want to hang on His every word.
In order for that to happen I must slow down. I must cease striving. I must be still. I must take the time to know He is God. He is more than able to handle everything that concerns me today. He is able to handle the issues of starting a new church. He is able to handle the issues that come with starting a new mowing business. He is able to handle the issues of time management.
Therefore, I can cast all my cares on the Lord for I know He cares for me. [I Pet 5:7] I know He is at work. I know He is faithful. Every time I cease striving I am reminded my Father is faithful. No matter what I am up against He remains steadfast and unmovable. There is a peace in that understanding.
When I get too busy I slowly allow my mind to drift to all the things that I need to do or to seek solutions to all the problems I face. Slowly my gaze turns from the Lord and I no longer behold Him. When this happens I am no longer singularly focused on the glorious pursuit.
I am grateful for a morning like this. A morning I can be still and cease striving. I am grateful for the opportunity to seek God with all my heart today and to not have to be in a rush. Lingering with Him is my only agenda for the day. Everything else is secondary. He is my glorious pursuit.
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