Tough And Tender

I like tough. I like tough jeans and boots that last. I like vehicles than can get 200,000 miles on them. I like tough athletes who overcome the challenges and get back up when they get knocked down. I like tough people who refuse to be intimidated by rich and powerful bullies. I like tough politicians who do not give into the prevailing political pressures of the day.

I have never been accused of being soft. I grew up hard. Much of my life has been hard. I've known abuse. I've been betrayed. I don't trust people easily. I am hard on myself and expect a lot of me. I raised my boys to boys to be tough. Many would say I have been too hard on them. I know life is hard and only tough young men will survive the trials they will encounter.

I preach hard. Many have called me a prophet. I have a fondness for the prophets. They saw things as black or white. They did not see issues in shades of grey. They preached fearlessly with God's message. Many were rejected and even persecuted but they stayed true because they were tough as nails. They had rawhide tough emotions and mentalities. They were tough.

I had to be tough in ministry.  Over the years I have faced many ornery church members and had numerous difficult conversations. I had to stand for God when the majority chose a different path. I had to trust God for provision when wicked church members tried to stave me out by withholding their tithes. I've been knocked down in ministry more times than I can count. Many dreams have died a hard death. I had to be tough to survive.

All most people see is my hard tough exterior. They do not see the tender side. They do not see me kiss Brenda good morning. They do not see me hug my boys almost every day. They have not been there in my prayer closet with the tears flowing in fervent intercessions for family, friends and flock. They do not see the pastoral visits in hospitals or consoling the grieving. They do not see the tender texts or notes sent in encouragement.

Many people tend to lean one way or the other. The world is filled with tough people. Too tough. They have no heart and show no compassion. They are hard. They do not mince words and do not care who they hurt in the process.

On the other hand, there are people who are too tender. They are soft. They do not have backbone. They get pushed around and shy away from confrontation. They love deeply, are filled with compassion and get pushed around and bullied easily.

It seems to me that Jesus is both tough and tender. He spoke hard truth to the Pharisees offending them by calling them hypocrites. His toughness showed when He faced the crowds who wanted to kill Him. He embraced scourging and crucifixion heroically. Jesus can be very tough. Tough in righteous judgment for the unredeemed.

He also shows great tenderness. Look at the way He dealt with the woman caught in adultery or the woman at the well. See His tenderness when He touched the leper and healed demoniacs. His compassion displayed when He raised Jairus' daughter and Lazarus from the dead. His tenderness shows each time He saves a sinner.

We all need to follow Jesus' example with a balance of tough and tenderness. I have such a long way to go. Only the Holy Spirit can produce this balance. O that the Lord would work in me to give me the steel like toughness to preach truth and stand against sin and injustice. At the same time I plead with Jesus to give me His heart of compassion for the lost, hurting and suffering. May He raise a tough and tender church.