Forgetting The Past

Sexual abuse. Physical abuse. Deception. Betrayal. Broken promises. Lies. Alcoholism.

Such things make up the past of many people. They make up my past. I brought all this baggage into adulthood. Such things in your past impact everything. It impacts the way you see the world, the  way you relate to people, and the way you approach life.

Some people have trouble coping with just one of those things in childhood. I hd to cope with all of them. These things were never talked about openly in my family. They were swept under the rug like they had been on both sides of my family for generations.

I floundered my way through childhood. My teenage years were harder. Not only the physiological changes but then there were the complicated emotions I tried to sort through. They were complicated further when my maternal grandfather died my sophomore year. He was my rock, my idol, my hero, and my father figure. Just when I needed him the most he was gone. I never cried harder in my life than when I learned he died. He never saw me play any high school or college football. We shared a love for sports. He bought me my first baseball glove. He taught me to catch and to throw. He took me to my first high school football game. We watched Monday Night Football games just the two of us. I wanted nothing more than to make him proud. As much as I loved him he never told me he loved me or was proud of me.

After he died and when I played varsity high school football I would run into people who knew my grandfather. He was standout athlete in my hometown. Tough. A fierce competitor. A man's man. I would never have known how my grandfather felt about me if some of his old friends had not told me the things he used to tell them about me. He was proud of me.

When I met Jesus in 1983 He began His masterful work of healing, shaping, and molding me into His vessel.A work that continues to this day. A work that has not always been easy or pleasant. The pressure from His  fingers in molding me like a piece of clay has brought many broken moments. His grip has been firm but gentle. Never harsh. His pressure to conform me after His image is relentless.

For much of my life I have been defined by my past. The moment I came into relationship with Jesus I was defined by my future. An eternal future. From time to time I can slip back into old destructive thought patterns. When I spend time alone with Jesus I get His perspective and His healthy thoughtful patterns.

Many people are more defined by their past than their future. Jesus offers a better eternal future. He also offers  a better temporal future. That temporal future may have some bumps along the way, a few trials, and several faith tests. His preferred future is more desirable than what we can plan for ourselves.

So let us put the past behind us. Let us look to a future walking with Jesus.

Philippians 3:12-14 (ESV)
¹²  Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own.
¹³  Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,
¹⁴  I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.