Alone But Not Lonely

How is it that some people can be surrounded by multitudes of people and yet feel alone. This can happen in apartment complexes, in neighborhoods, big cities, on college campuses, and in the work place. On the other hand, some people can live alone and yet rarely ever feel lonely. These are singles, widows, and widowers. Somehow such people have mastered being alone and yet not feeling alone.

Many people hate to be alone. They crave contact with people. Such people are extroverts. Introverts, on the other hand, prefer isolation. They shy away from crowds.

The secret to being alone but not feeling lonely has to be more than just being and extrovert verses and introvert. To be sure widows and widowers will feel lonely at times missing their spouses. Divorced people will feel lonely missing the companionship of former lovers. Empty nesters will miss the sound of kids in the house.

How do you cope being alone but not feeling lonely. I think a few keys are helpful. First, cultivate a close relationship with God. When this  is developed a person living alone need not feel lonely. God promised to never leave or forsake us. God never sleeps so He watches over us all the time. His constant presence is reason for comfort and security.

Another key is stay as active as possible at cultivating relationships. Remember there are other lonely people. Phone conversations, emails, letters, greeting cards, and text messages are great ways to stay connected to people. Don't forget personal visits. You know how you feel when you receive one from a thoughtful person. Sharing meals is another great way to stay in contact with people.

A third key is to get involved in a small group in your church. Whether that be a Sunday School class or a home study group get involved. Build deep relationships in those groups. Go in looking how you can minister to others and give your life away as much or more than going in looking for what you can receive. Deep connections can be forged studying God's words in small group settings.

Lastly, all of us whether alone or sharing life with loved ones, need to learn to find our contentment in God. Paul communicated in the book of Philippians that he learned to be content in all circumstances.   The word content means to be sufficient and to be satisfied. IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES. All circumstances can include being alone.

Don't get me wrong. God created us for communion with Him and other people. All of have to be alone from time to time. Some people have to travel for their jobs. Being alone is sometimes forced on people. Sometimes meals have to be eaten alone. Many times there is no one on the other side of the bed.

In those moments God is there. In those moments contact with other people is critical. Sometimes you have to take the initiative to make contact first. Learning to find satisfaction in God is most important. I believe it is possible to be alone and yet not be lonely.