Parenting is Hard

Parenting is hard. In fact, it is very hard. Parents can pray, make wise Godly decisions, seek to protect their children from negative influences, communicate scriptural values, but some children still fall away into a life of rebellion. This truth remains; every child is born a sinner and that sinful nature will take over from time to time. [Rom 3:23] Even if your children trust Christ for salvation they will find what you and have found. We will battle the sinful nature all the days of our lives. [Gal 5:16-17]

Some parents are too strict as they seek to protect their children from the world. Some parents are too lenient. Neither is good. We all try to do the best we can but even the most devout parents who have tried to do things by the book have experienced heartache from wayward children.

I found myself seated on the back porch yesterday afternoon with my three oldest sons having a tough and honest conversation about their relationship with the Lord. We talked about loving Jesus. We talked about worship. We talked about quiet times. We talked about just showing up at church verses really coming to learn and to connect with God. We talked about my role as a pastor (and for the last two years as their youth pastor) and father. None of them said they resented my being a pastor.

I want for my children what most Christian parents want. I want them to love God and to serve Him authentically. I want them to hunger to know God all their days. This is easier said and done. I have preached way too many youth camps, retreats, and revivals to be fooled. The church is often failing when it comes to producing solid followers of Christ in their student ministries. The church cannot do it alone. Parents have to stay involved. When I think of the vast amounts of money being spent on teenager's spiritual growth it disheartens me when I see so many apathetic.

One of my sons told me he had a hard time hearing from God. He said he doesn't know at times if God is speaking or if he is inventing things in his head. Another son told me it is much easier for him when I lead him in quiet times to help him understand. Another repented of sin once his brothers had left to me privately. He had been convicted of something he did a long time ago but felt God wanted him to make it right with his mother and me. Through tears he spilled his guts. I brought him over and sat him in my lap. He is much bigger now and this does not happen too often. I told him I loved him looking him in the eyes and letting him know that my love for him was just the same as if he had not sinned. I also told him I was proud of him for being honest and doing the right thing. Another son told me about a failure he had and we worked our way through it.

Parenting is hard especially if you are trying to raise Christ followers. It would be easier to give up the fight and to just give in to the times. It feels like swimming against the current every day. That is exactly what we are doing. We are swimming against the current of a pagan world building a biblical world view.

Stay the course. Keep having those honest talks. Keep speaking Bible truth. Keep praying and pointing your children to follow Christ and build their lives on the foundation of God's Word even when it is not easy. Do it even when it seems like they are not listening or even interested.

In the end, all of our children have to own their faith for it to be real and meaningful. We can pray and pray that happens. Before that let us make sure Jesus is real and meaningful to us first. Parenting is hard but God is able to help us navigate the course.